June

This month Falco said goodbye to nappies forever… He was fully toilet-trained and dry at night in a couple weeks. We celebrated by getting him a big new bed, which meant a bit of sorting and arranging as, being number three, he is stuck with the smallest bedroom in the house. We managed to make it nice by using a folding bed and hanging cupboards, so he even has a desk to sit at. We had been thinking of giving him a high bed that he could sit and play under, but that would probably take away too much light. It took a good deal of shuffling around of furniture and some mistakes to get things to fit. It is a pretty small room, but of course he will grow up (probably to be some great long, hairy thing) expecting no better. That’s what we are telling ourselves anyway…

Daniel is starting to get his grown-up teeth. We are hoping that a tooth will grow in his top set to replace the one that was knocked out in an accident.

Matthijs and Daniel both went on school trips this month. Daniel’s class went to the Juliana Tower, which is a theme park in Apeldoorn and Matthijs class went the the Efteling. They both had a great time. Matthijs was not allowed in all the rides, but did go in a few that the rest of his class did not date to try… We are resolved that we will go back as a family when they are all old enough to appreciate it: those things are pretty expensive.

Matthijs got sent to sit in the corridor at school for noisy behavior and climbed on the chair so he could look in on the class. Unfortunately he tumbled off and landed with his bottom on a clothes hook. No major damage, but he cried so loudly that we got told about the accident by all the other classes when we fetched him. The school checked that he was ok and he bounced back enough to joke about it when he got back to class. Tough little guys we have…

The big boys both did the 4-evening-walk (Avondvierdaagse) and kept up without difficulty. Next year we take Falco so Marjolein will not be able to weasel out of it any more.

Marjolein brilliantly planned to go out with he entire basketball team on Father’s Day. That suggests that the rest of the team is also not highly attuned to guy-related stuff… She ended up getting up a cock-crow, fixing breakfast in bed, corralling kiddos with handiwork and then dashing out of the house to make her appointment. I got jumped on, I got to watch my children eat my breakfast and was presented with weird handicrafts with a father-ish theme. Actually that is pretty much wonderful.

Marjolein had a great time sailing on the IJsselmeer (=huge lake/cut off bit of sea) with her team, chatting, swimming, eating nice food and generally having a good time.

She got the spend most of the rest of the month chasing down specialists for Daniel’s ear, and for her mother’s asthma. Daniel will need to have a hearing aid in his right ear. The lovely insurance people pay nothing towards this as it is (pause for laughter) NOT a handicap unless you need hearing aids in both ears. I would rather like the person that thought up that little catch-22 to be afflicted with major hearing loss in one ear. Unworthy thought, but still.. Hearing aids are 400 euros and up, but we will have to find a solution because it can make a big difference to Daniel’s ability to acquire language, follow lessons or even socialize.

Marjolein also spent a lot of time supporting her mother, who is suffering from asthma, Graves disease (thyroid disease) and possibly allergies to the antibiotics and anti-inflammatory drugs she received for her respitory problems. None of the problems is life threatening but they do make her weak and uncoordinated, so she cannot drive and cannot handle long visits with the toads: a great shame as they love seeing her and she likes seeing them.

After the preceding text was written we were visited at the end of June by two policemen who informed us that Marjolein’s mother had ended her own life. It was a terrible shock, but, with hindsight, consistent with everything she had always said: she did not wish to become old and incapable. It is the sort of thing many people say and do not follow-up on. Marjolein’s mother was more decisive and pragmatic than most. Letters and documents Marjolein found waiting for her made it clear that her mother had been carefully preparing this step for more than six months: it was not some momentary impulse, but a well-considered decision which we must respect, despite our grief and regret.